Day 6

Lots of food today again and lots and lots of movies!

Great expectations II

I couldn’t remember if I already had ‘Great Expectations’ as a blog title so therefore this shall be number deux! Even if there isn’t a ‘Great Expectations’ I won’t change, cause deux is deux, can’t change that.

Today I had my exam in math – Algebra, I think I failed so badly. I just can’t fix the tasks at all completely. I am very angry at myself cause I like math, it’s just that this was another type of math that I haven’t studied before, or at least math in another form, or shape. So, my high expectations on this course was totally wiped out, there was nothing to expect, except that it was so damn hard.

My mind has been wandering away from school work as well, that might be because of the fact that I am moving out this weekend. So last night I slept on the floor and now I will go and pick mom up from work and then go to Karlstad to move in. Picture will come soon!

So tatahh my friends!

Boredom STRIKE!

Mathias in a nutshell

Nom!

This is it. The grand happening in my life so far is about to take place. Next Thursday, I will get the keys to my own apartment That right after they have checked my apartment so that the previous owner has cleaned it well and shit. My own place. Woah dudeness! So on Thursday, when the check up is at 2 p.m. I will also bring lots of boxes with things and carry them up there! That way, we don’t have that much to move except furnitures and all that jazz. I’m so excited and still I have lots to do before that I just want the exams to be over next week so that I can move in.

Now I better study so I might pass the exams, most unlikely though. This is hard shit.
*hugs and kisses*

Uncle Watermelon

I gotta say that I love long weekends. Yes, I have lots of stuffs to do and due to some things that happened yesterday I haven’t been able to focus at all, good thing that things are much better now.
Last weekend I got this huge breakdown, long time since that happened like that but thanks to that my mind has started working in different ways again which is nice. I no longer tell myself that I am useless when it comes to school things, I will learn as much as I can. No one can do this for me, it’s all up to myself and I will make it, and if I don’t I have at least tried and I know that I have done my best.

Some new music has been sent from above, thank you the Queens of Germany and Skåne and also the King of Östersund for the music! The music I am writing about is a little Queen, The Beatles and Amy Macdonald, I have approximately thee Cd’s full with music now and my iPod is very happy to play me music now.

Oh Heroes is on tellie now. ^.^ mkthxbai!

Superhero

If I could marry a Superhero I would marry Batman. After seeing lots of movies this weekend I completely loved the new Batman movie The Dark Knight I was a bit skeptical at first when people claimed this to be Heath Ledgers best role ever I didn’t want to believe it, I mean of course people will phrase him for it when it’s one of his last big movies since he died. But, it truly was his best in my eyes and I don’t want to give all of you too high hopes on this movie but it’s up to everyone else to say their opinion about it. I just happened to agree to many of the others. So maybe I should have aimed for to marry Heath Ledger or The Joker himself? Batman as always been one of my favorite heroes cause he is human. He doesn’t have these superpowers that makes him immortal or anything like that, he’s cleaver and has got a huge load of cash from his work as well. He never help people just to win something out of it like praises, he saves people.

Enough praises from me now. Before the movie we saw another one at the cinema in Karlstad – Hancock with Will Smith where he plays the superhero Hancock that really destroys more than he help people in the long turn. So a guy within the PR-business wants to help Hancock out after being saved by him. The movie was better than I thought and I didn’t expect it to end that way! Love those movies.

Before we left home to Karlstad we watched the movie The Last Legion and it was kind of OK. Have seen better but for being kind of lame in the middle of the movie, the ending was OK and they wrapped it up good with the story of King Arthur and the Excalibur.

We rented a movie yesterday along with The Last Legion, and that movie was a movie me and my brother has been wanting to watch for quite awhile now – No Country For Old Men. A very interesting movie indeed! To explain it shortly, how someone’s life can be turned upside down from taking something that you find. I can really recommend people to see it and yet again, people have been praising this movie and it’s the winner of 3 or 4 Oscars so I didn’t think too much of this movie to begin with. I was happily surprised with it and gosh it freaked me out many times. I like those kinds of thrillers. Long time since I saw such a good thriller.

I will also tell you guys that I am home form Östersund now, which I think you all know by now. And yesterday, on my first day at home from my trip, me and bro were out on this tour of our town. Bro is making a documentary hopefully about our town and he needed something to start working on so he can make people interested in his work. So we went on the two tours that day, it was nice indeed and I ran around with the microphone. Between the two tours I got a text message from Magnus saying that they were on their way through Filipstad soon. They are on vacation and going down to Lidköping and Göteborg so they went by and got a little coffee, tea, lemonade  and sandwiches to eat on while they took a break here. It was so nice to meet Magnus’ family and they were really nice! Now I miss my buddy even more

Work starts on Monday night and then also Tuesday night, then I am off again!

Gosh now I will talk to Mathias and tease him for Gingerballs!

Vacation Workout!

A walk on about 6 km down to down, a walk later on like 3-4 km and also a walk for like over an hour then today it was more like a run mixture with fast walking for an hour or so. It has been nice indeed!

Today I relaxed while the boys were working and I watched the movie Donnie Darko, great movie indeed! I have seen it before but it was a while ago so it was nice seeing the movie again. ^.^ I did study a little Japanese today! Which made me proud cause now I feel like I can start and get real with this!

During the days here I have got to meet some of Magnus’ friends! Yesterday it was Nicklas and today it was his special girl Bodil and then also her friend Maria. *giggle* You all should have seen Magnus looks when he looked at Bodil and it was all übercute! ^^

Now I am too tired to even keep my eyes up. So brushie brushie those teethlings and then straight to bed <3

Spongebob Square Pants June 2008

Flow

Lately, my mood has been going down the gutter, again. I hate the fact that I always get like this as soon as I start to have a good time in life. Just flips the coin all of a sudden. After pounding this subject all over in my head for the last few days I have realized some important things that might even help me to feel a bit better about it all. The problem is all about me and my feelings towards myself. How much I wish not to be a disappointment for anyone and once I get the feeling that I am, BOOM, down in the gutter taking it for self-critique. Then everything turns against me, even the smallest of things makes me half smashed in the wall and I am left there, trying to figure out what I did wrong. And that is driving me crazy.

Sometimes, people do step upon me, trying to make me feel less worthy of a life and that I am not good for anything. It’s always been like that. Luckily it’s not as bad now as it used to be, but still. People shouldn’t be stepping up on anyone, it all should be one smooth dance that even the clumsiest could join in on, and even if you loose rhythm you will flow with it all anyway. No one would be stepped upon and everyone would dance together, no one left alone. No one feeling like it’s never going to work or that everything is his or her fault. Just go with the flow and loving it. Feeling it. Leaving everybody else’s opinion behind.

Personal Instructor

I have always wanted to have one and also become one, all that since the days I started working out several of times a week. Today I took a little further step in that direction and took mom, bro and Ludde out in the tracks and did a little routine with them. I decided that I would go easy on them since it’s been awhile for them since they did anything like this. So, I decided that we were going to walk 1km fast den jog for like, what could it be 700m approximately and then walk and see when they felt like running again, giving them choices on where they could run. I am really satisfied that we choose the 5 km track and that they were able to go through with it! Mom bought new training shoes yesterday and she is really in for this all of starting to run with me! I am so proud of her!

Today I will make a little clean up in my room again… I will fix with some important papers and let mom help me how to organize it all. Then I plan to finish writing the Japanese which I am copying the exam with all the correct answers so I have my own copy of it all. Then also I will be able to see all the correct ones, what I did wrong etc and be able to see how the sentences are supposed to look like.

The economics will still have to wait before I go to Östersund to see Magnus on Sunday next weekend, I will have plenty of time to both sleep and to read through the book!  And with him working one day I think it was, I will also be able to maybe do some of all the tasks. I am so damn motivated that I will make these both exams at the moment!

I will also change the bedsheets today, since I bought some new when we were in Ullared! Totally girly but guess what, I’m a girl, not a guy who’s gay. ^.^

Word of Wisdom

When I graduated mom, dad and my brother Markus had fixed some words of wisdom-quotes all together in a little book that I know mom made. She had done the same for my two closest cousins and for my brother as well. So last year when it was my turn to finally graduate I got my own, I read it all and then I put it on the place where I found it today. I love those kinds of gestures from someone, because it means someone has taken their time to make something like this for someone else and I mean, finding fitting words of wisdom is hard. So I am very thankful for these 11 ones that’s in my little paper book. Here are some of them directly translated into English so if they doesn’t make any sense, well, buu-hu!

“You only learn from the things that’s going against you”

“The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time”

“Even if everyone has the same opinion, they all can be wrong”

“Love is the only thing that can breed when we waste it”

“Money doesn’t make anyone happy, but I rather cry in a Jaguar than in a bus”

“When the wind of change is blowing, some builds cover for the wind, while others build windmills”

That is all.